Something funny to lighten the mood!

[Tug-n-pull]

A LETTER FROM MY NEIGHBOR, NOW A MARINE RECRUIT AT CAMP PENDLETON

Dear Ma and Pa;

Am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer
the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile.
Tell them to join up quick before maybe all of the places are
filled. I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed
till nearly 6 a.m., but am getting so I like to sleep late.

Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth
your cot and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch,
mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

Men got to shave, but it ain't so bad, they get warm water.
Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal,
eggs, bacon, etc, but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham,
steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food. But tell

Walt and Elmer you can always sit between two city boys that
live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon, when
you get fed again.

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on
"route" marches, which the Platoon Sergeant says are long
walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell
him different. A "route march" is about as far as to our
mailbox at home. Then the city guys gets sore feet and we all
ride back in trucks. The country is nice, but awful flat.

The Sergeant is like a schoolteacher. He nags some. The
Capt. is like the school board. Majors and Colonels just ride
around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep
getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bullseye is
near as big as a chipmunk and don't move. And it ain't
shooting at you, like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to
do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load
your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other
fellers get into this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,
Gail

P.S. Speaking of shooting, enclosed is $200 towards a new
barn roof and ma's teeth. The city boys shoot craps, but not
very good.

Tug [addsig]

[jeepmaster]

hahaha as i read it i was picturing a hick guy, never would have expected the girl lol. thats great. nothing like a girl who can lay waste to a couple city boys.[addsig]

[MudderChuck]

A few weeks ago driving up the street, I see this 200lb. character slapping the bejesus out of his girl friend, I suddenly hear, stop the car, 6 ft. and a 180 pounds of terror jump out of the car and lays one up side, of this dudes head. He kinda switches ends (his feet end up where his head was). My daughter climbs back in the car and says I really hate a bully. :-D [addsig]

[jeepmaster]

wow[addsig]

[Tug-n-pull]

Mudder Chuck we need to keep your daughter and my wife away from each other. Together the two of them could do some real damage and wind up in jail. Tell your girl I am one her top fans. Mommy Tug carries a stainless 38 sp. and a spyderco everywhere and has the carry permit to do so. She will stand and shoot with out so much as a flinch in paint ball and color you like you owe her money. Keeps all of the boys here in fear of the momma. Tug ;-) [addsig]

[bigTlilODD]

NO PAINTBALL!!!!!!! I have a bruise on my chest right next to my armpit, that's bigger than a silver dollar. And extremely painful. Worse welt I've ever got. At the field I was practicing at, my wife and I were discussing finances. I want a new bicycle frame that costs $1800.00. Money is a little tight and my wife says that we can't afford it yet and to wait about 2 or 3 months. This little girl, ok she's about 20, turns to us and says, "We do girls always complain about men spending money on their toys, you should let him get it." So being the genius that I am, I step out of the way! My wife started in on her with, "Well, when you move out of your parents home and have bills...." It was hilarious! Then the girl says, "Well I'd rather have a motorcycle than a home." My wife said, "Where the hell you gonna keep it? In you apartment?" I thought my wife was gonna pick up my paintball gun and light this little girl up! Later the guys on that girls team gave her crap and told her to shut up.[addsig]

[far_right]

funny todd....so how did you get hit[addsig]

[RayOvac]

Todd that is nothing...back last summer I was playing paintball with some friends. They came over and had got some used guns from someone for cheap so we worked on em and got em to shoot pretty good. However we didn't have enough money for air, balls, and masks too so we just bought some air and balls. Went out in the woods and started playing and just said we would just be careful not to shoot at someone above the shoulders. Well we played for some time and yeah we all got a few welps but then it started to get dark and me and a friend got into an intense firefight from like 10 feet away...well you guessed it...I got hit RIGHT square between the eyes. That really sucked. It swelled up so bad it looked like I had a paintball inside my head. Plus I was bleeding from several places on my face and nose where the pieces of the ball cut it when it busted. One thing I do know now....I will NEVER play paintball without a mask EVER again.[addsig]

[jeepmaster]

damn you are so lucky you didnt lose an eye[addsig]

[far_right]

yup then he would look like this ;-) [addsig]

[Bullet3600]

I used to play paintball about 14yrs ago professionally, in Providence the state was going to blow up a 15 story high rise building and allowed 10 teams to play in it before demolishing it. Well it was around 20 degrees and the damn balls were freezing, I had my mask on and got shot in the jaw and ended up getting ripped open from my chin to almost the ear. I'll never forget that day..............Bullet

edited by: Bullet3600, Feb 24, 2003 - 09:56 PM[addsig]

[far_right]

speakin of paintballs...anyone want to but a spyder compact, been shot 100 times MAYBE all the crap that goes w/ it make me an offer...all procedes will go the the clint's jeep fund!! :-D :-D :-D [addsig]